How to respond amidst uncertainty.

In October, I'll be graduating in college. Exciting. I'm certainly glad that after 5 school years, I'm finally shifting to the next stage of my life. Though as much as I'd like to finally get rid off the status of being a student, I can't help but be affected by my imminent departure and the sadness it brings that I seem to always pay no attention to. Maybe because deep within, the reality of the situation makes me afraid. 

It comforts me to know that I'm not alone at being afraid of big changes. But it scares me even more to know that I have no idea what's in store ahead for me. We have to admit, we all are scared of something. We can try to live in our own pretenses and faux realities but the truth is: "We can't stop being afraid just by pretending that everything that scares us isn't there." -Michael Smith 

As I'm writing this, I'm convicted and coerced to check the places where I have let fear take hold in my life. And as a Christian, it is my duty and responsibility to focus on what God wants me to do and who He wants me to be. In short, what honors God and what is good and beneficial for me and my character.

It's usually correct when said that we tend to create our own problems, more so if you're transitioning to another stage in life. Mistakes are inevitable. But sometimes we choose to suffer for all the wrong reasons, even when we know they're wrong. However, much of what happened or happens in life cannot be blamed solely on us. Sometimes, we are caught in a process much bigger than ourselves. However, our actions sometimes show that we choose to become part of the problem and not part of the solution. We sometimes choose to live under our circumstances rather than rise above them. 

In life, there are situations over which we have no control of (broken families, for instance), but there are others that we can control (decisions we make). This struggle of knowing what is right and what is beneficial for us is real and this struggle is usually recurrent. Sometimes, we don't even know what we are struggling for. Having known this, the question we should be asking ourselves should then be, are we creating lasting value with what we are struggling for? 

At the heart of the matter is the sin-oriented nature we have all inherited. It can be partly controlled, but not fully overcome, by human effort. We could make a mess of our lives when we don't try to change the things we could change. God has a solution though. His answer is not control, but a changed life. And to have a changed life, one must turn to God, trust Him to forgive your sinful past, and begin to change your attitude towards Him and others. And this is the truth, that our mistakes and sufferings are included in God's great plan and destiny for each and every one of us.

We can be more than happy

“What is crooked cannot be straightened;

What is lacking cannot be counted.”

-   Ecclesiastes 1:15

Have you ever been happy? I have. Happiness is plainly defined as a sense of satisfaction with a person, an arrangement, or a situation. I believe that each of us want to be happy. Implied or not, we all have the desire for enjoyment, pleasure, and a form of paradise we all fantasize about. Even the people who express resentment against happiness are unsuspectingly happy for they themselves are satisfied with what they have put their confidence in. But can we ever believe with all certainty that we are content with what we have? I myself have asked this question and I’m not surprised that I can’t say yes.

As young as I am, I have met and known different people from differing social standings and each of them had their own version of what happiness is. Some buy their way into happiness, thinking that the more you have, the happier you are. Some toil to get it, believing that it takes patience, wisdom, and grit to earn true happiness. And for some, they only dream about it, happiness is but a daydream. The truth of the matter is that happiness depends on happenings. Happiness ceases to exist when there are no happenings. It’s not wrong to be happy, but it is dangerous to think that we would be content only with it.

As brilliant as we might seem, we are aware that there are just some things that we cannot seem to answer. In life, there is an ultimate perplexity and confusion that comes to us because of all the unanswered questions. But there is more to life than the search for happiness. There is more to life than laughter, accomplishments, wisdom, pleasure, relationships, or earthly prosperity. There is hope. There is joy. And this is what we should be looking for.

Joy is far deeper than happiness; we can feel joy in spite of our deepest troubles. Happiness is temporary because it is based on external circumstances, but joy is lasting because it is based on God’s presence within us.

Happiness is unpredictable; joy defeats uncertainty. Joy defeats pain, sadness, insecurity, and discouragement; happiness covers it up. Joy is lasting; happiness is temporary.

 There is hope for man to be perennially and deeply satisfied beyond what is perceived because of joy. And joy comes from knowing and trusting God and is stable as long as you trust God. Don’t base your life on circumstances, but on God. Because God wants you to be more than what you have in mind.

Just to be clear, I don’t write to convince you to believe in what I believe. I’m simply making you consider what you already know. Because truth is, there really is hope for true happiness which is everlasting joy regardless of what is happening in this world that could only be found in the presence of God. And if you are a student of life, I challenge you today to embark on this new journey of getting to know who God really is. It’s not and will never be easy, but I assure you one thing, you will find what you are looking for.

Carpe diem

"There's a time for daring and there's a time for caution, and a wise man understands which is called for." 

-John Keating, Dead Poets Society.

I want to dedicate my first entry to Robin Williams. I never was really an enthusiast and I barely even knew who he was. But through his films, I was given the great privilege to see and experience what he wanted to give to the world. 

My biggest fear in life is to be average. Afraid that my life won't matter. Afraid that my life will fail to make a difference. It's funny and ironic to think this way yet inclined to do otherwise. I never really wanted to do anything extraordinary in my life, even the thought of being "great" at something is quick to make me retreat to the darkest place I regard: my comfort zone. And blogging? Crossed my mind, intentions seemed right, inspiration was not lacking, but fear is paralyzing. 

I never really wanted or even dreamed of being a writer. I presumed that pouring a lot of yourself into something such as writing is more of an act of vanity rather than an endeavor. I was led to believe that those who pursue greatness only wanted to do great things because they assumed something in return, which is prominence. Don't get me wrong, I am not against people who strive for greatness, striving itself is considered great. What pestered me is having to know and face the fact that not all who pursue greatness have the right intentions.

So why am I doing this? Believe me, it's a question that will never go away but at the same time it's also a question that reaffirms my intentions. Ernest Hemingway once said, all he wanted to do was write one true sentence. It just so happened that I also share his ambition.

Though I haven't dreamed of becoming a famous writer, I did dream of creating important work. Create something that connects to people and help them as they suffer through the human condition. But as authentic as my intentions are in doing this, I am sadly aware that not all will embrace what I have to impart. But what I do have is hope, that someday, you will see the reason why an average joe seized an opportunity to try and make a difference even in the smallest way he possibly can. And to those who choose to support my advocacy, thank you, because you, in return, fuel my aspiration. Because to be honest, I want to reach an audience. 

As what you are already aware of, I am also a fellow human being. I've already had my fair share of mistakes done and I know that I will continue to make more. I'm not really eager to commit mistakes but I am eager to learn from them. And as I journey, I could only hope for you to join me towards seizing each and every single day. Every struggle, every experience, every change, and every opportunity for growth.